ChildhoodAh, the simple joys of childhood.  Little league, catching fireflies on a summer night, recess in the playground, and watching pornography outside your neighbors window after school.

That was the case in Grand Forks, ND, where a woman who lives net to an elementary school was charged with disorderly conduct after porn was allegedly playing on her television with her front door open and volume at a maximum level.

Employees at the school reported the loud, conspicuous pornography out of concerns for students who were arriving in the morning.  While I like to watch hard core porn with my morning bowl of raisin bran as much as the next guy, I usually shut the blinds and listen at a reasonable volume.

Though one might say the kids were going to find out about the birds and the bees eventually anyways, conventional wisdom says to leave such things as double penetration up to the imagination until they turn 13 at least.

To top things off, when police arrived at the house, she physically resisted the officers.  She was extracted by force and proceeded to bite the officer’s arm, kick him in the groin, and spit in his face.

Fluid exchange of any kid from this woman might be cause for alarm, but she did her best to eloquently dispel any fears during her hearing.

“I have a cold and don’t believe I touched anybody’s skin when I spit on the cop that I did,” she said.

You could likely substitute the word “cold” for the phrase “lack of brain function” and get a more accurate description of this trollop.  So next time you want to get kinky and there is a possibility of a group of children walking by your house, draw the blinds, please.

RELATED LINK: GF woman accused of showing porn video from window, assaulting cop